Saturday, July 21, 2012

In His Hands

So many years ago I lost a grandson at 10 months of age. He had never been sick and was the absolute apple of everyones eye. He went to sleep one morning and neveer woke up again....CIDS had claimedd another victim. No warning just pain left behind to fill an unfillable void. I remember every minute and what I waas doing that day and the thoughts I was having.....at 12:30 I was showing pictures of him to a friend and telling her all about him and he was proably dying....I in one place and he in another some two hundred miles away. The pain never goes away even though more grandkids have been born and those that were young then have grown up. I thought at that time, I could never get over that pain and struggled to fiqure out what God could possibly be trying to tell me. Then something like today happens and I know.....No person or living thing is a mistake in God's eyes. We are all put here with a purpose and timeline.....and we are alwayss in his hands. It is an awesome place to be and as a grandmother of six and Kane, I always want the best for them and my Lord is it.....In living through that time and the many illnesses I have survived since, the pain does not compare but it has helped me console many and the following years as they suffered and questioned their faith.....I pray tonight for all concerned in this...all across the nation. I pray for your healing and pray that you let people come to you through God to ease your pain........God has always and will always love you....love Pokie

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Today and Yesterday

For months I have been sorting through my life and my families life. Pictures, clothing and ANTIQUES ...an antique(me) sorting a life time. This could have been made much easier if my parents had not been horders. McDonald plastic cups, Arby salad bowls, peanut butter plactic containers, paper and plastic bags and it goes on and on. Mixed in with an array of STUFF, you might find, money, 22 shells,fish hooks,pictures and more. Am I doing this in one house? No,two! Never was a Christmas card or birthday card discarded nor an article of clothing. Clothing my brother and I wore in the sixties hang proudly in the closet waiting for a time to come when they will be in fashion again. It's not their fault(my parents)they grew up in the depression...very poor. Nothing in that time had only one life and was never discarded wheither it was chipped or discolored. As I carry a box of this and a box of that up stairs to go through it, I cannot help but wonder if the eighteen year olds of today have any idea what poor really is. Do they know the value of things from fifty to a hundred years ago? I fit into that bracket of fifty to one hundred and I wonder what value they think I have. Just when I want to step out to investigate and enjoy some of the things I pasted by to have my kids. I do not regret that move but I can no longer do three days work in one, as I did then. I can't lift in front of me and carry. I can't lift twice my size. Yes, I am old at 65 BUT I know my best friend (BF) has me right where he wants me and a I will survive. Be there no doubt, that best friend is my Lord. This is something I needed or I would not have been presented with it. I WILL sort through this and mail the assorted things from the past to the assorted people they first belonged to and I WILL feel that my mission is done and hopefully God will grant me another twenty years to thank him... It is a shame you get so smart so late in life. You see loves you should have stayed with, money you should have saved and roads you should have taken but I believe I am making My Maker happy. Bear with my moods through this because I am sure the old me is still in there. I can tell you that with the exception of 5mg warafin, I am completely drug free .....No seizure or parkinson meds, no diabetic or blood pressure meds...tylenol extra for pain and inflamation and vitamins....Thank you Lord....love Pokie

Today With PokieToo and Parkinson's and Acute RA Disease