Friday, August 27, 2010

"Old"

For four years or more, I have been in search of answers to many questions that enter in and out of my life. One of them is when does one become old? While growing up; "old" was my grandparents and the little ladies at church with the heavy nylon stockings which always seemed to sag somewhere and the shriveled up little men who carried gum to entice you into good behavior and light conversation. As I got older; " old" was ladies with too much makeup and too funny a color hair and men wearing bad fitting topees. After sixty; I went into denial and refused to address the subject any longer. I am now sixty three and think of "old" as a hundred and can only hope, if I make it, I do so with company. No one wants to be alone but particularly when your old. Pain seems worse as does thinking. Life is so much easier with a friend.....and life has graced me with many friends and lots of love. Recently my life took another turn and this turn came at a particularly bad time but as it seems, God did not wish me to decide I was done and give up. As I made my Bucket List in preparation for my inevitable demise He intervened, as He always does and sent me down yet another path.....teaching me once again I am not in control and never was . Only my Lord decides when and where and just how happy or unhappy you shall be. I HAVE NOW COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT"Old" is just a word not to be thought about. Some may be "old " at twenty or maybe born old......I chose to stay forever a kid in my heart and possibly that kid will convince my mind and body that "Old" just doesn't exist.....Love ya always Pokie

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